Entry 5: Sunny Sunday

Dear Diary,

Howdy! Long time no type! I have BIG news! All last week I was a model for some website for doggie dresses and tees! I was very excited and tried on so many things I can't remember most of them. I'll describe a few for you. The first one was dark brown with pink poka dots. It was ruffly too, and itchy. I tried on another one that was white with green and blue flowers on it, and blue ruffles on the bottom. I loved it, it was so darn comfy! The other one I remember was yellow with pink and purple flowers on it; it was pretty comfy too! I tried on a lot of tees too. Here are some I tried on: "Cute as a (button on the back)", "Bark for a cure (a pink ribbon was on it too)", "Super Model", "Yappy Hour, "Desperate Housedogs", and "Looking for a Brad Pittbull". I didn't know what half of them meant, but I tried them on and they took their photos.

They let me take home a dress, and I took the white one. I went home and played in it all afternoon and slept in it. Now I have two dresses! HIP HIP HOORAAAAYYYY!!!!


To answer some questions from Big Lobo:

1. Probably so since I looked up the word "lobo"
2. No I am not afraid of him...he is just a little too wild for me.
3. Yes she throws a ball or a toy and I bring it back. My late brother would go fetch it but wouldn't bring it back.
4. I'm not too spoiled for a Yorkie. Yorkies generally sleep on silk pillows with dangly things on the corners and eat out of a crystal bowl. I sleep on a pile of dirty clothes and eat out of a bowl that my young momma painted my name on it. I live a simple life...I suppose.

Today wasn't too exciting though. I stayed inside for most of the day and played with the mean pussy (I know shocking right?!?) I went outside and slept in the bunker and ate berries and flowers. I played with my neighbors and chased squirrels. I ate my dinner inside and went back out for a little bit. I came back in, put my dress on and played and slept for the rest of the night.

I finally tired out and went to my dirty clothes pile for a full night's sleep.

Much luv and Sunnyness,
Maggie

Entry 4: Terrific Tuesday

Dear Diary,

Today was definitely "Terrific Tuesday"! I got to stay inside all day long! I was very happy and got to sleep in the mean pussy's bed too. I got doggy treats and to play with my toys the whole day! No one bothered to put me out because my big daddy and momma left this morning talking about going to someone's house. And my little momma read the whole morning and my human brother slept through the morning. At midday they both came down and ate their food they call "lunch" and argued about something. The mean pussy came down and started rooting around on my peepee papers. My little momma came over and got mad at him and put him over the gate and told him to go eat his food. Of course, him being the mean and stubborn pussy that he is, he jumped right over and buried himself in the papers again. I was enjoying this show. Finally my young momma put him over the gate and closed the door. He started mee-ooww-ing and scratching at the door. My young momma and human brother laughed and continued their "lunch". They left and I was sad and alone...but not for long because I was joined by the mean pussy for a long battle with chasing and barking/hissing and scratching and biting. He finally left when he got hungry and thank the kibble he left.

I was exhausted and slept in the mean puss's bed for a long time and was awakened by my little momma when she came down and picked me up, (bed and all) and carried me up to her room. She petted me and we watched the glow box. It was a lot of fun and I fell asleep in my bed next to her on her bed. She woke me up and mentioned something about needing to go somewhere. And then she put me back downstairs. I didn't see her or anyone for a few moments and then she came down followed by my big momma. (I figured she and my big daddy came home when I was asleep and I didn't notice.) Then my human brother came down and they left somewhere. I slept and played with my toys and had my dinner.

Much later, my little momma and my big momma and my human brother came home together. For the rest of the night I slept happily and had a Terrific "Tuesday"!

Much luv and Terrificnesses, (?!?!?)
Maggie

Entry 3: Manic Monday

Dear Diary,

Yesterday was pretty grey. (the sky I mean) It looks like it today too. My best friends still haven't come out...

This morning was a normal Monday (as you humans call them.). My young momma left my pink dress on me last night and I slept comfortably. But when the sun rose, my young momma tried to take it off of me. I was mad and ran around barking "No! NOOOO!" and finally gave in when I was cornered. Then she plopped me outside...another long day, I guessed.

It was 4:45 and the Whurperts STILL hadn't come out to see me. I was very sad and moped around in the backyard. The occasional times that I came up to the porch, the mean pussy was sitting by the door saying "Nanner Nanner boo boo, I'm in and you're out" and would scratch at the window. I'd get mad and growl and snarl at the window and my young momma would take the mean puss up stairs. I need therapy, (that's what the border collie said who lives in the house behind me.) she knows everything about "therapy" and continued to strongly recommend it. I agreed, still not knowing who to talk to. Finally when the Whurperts came out, I ran to Cheetah, and asked her about "therapy" and all the sadness I was going through. She told me it will all work out on it's own, and I didn't need to have therapy. She assured me that something happy and Buh-reerififc would happen and it would make me forget about my little puppy problems.

Soon enough it was nighttime and I was exhausted. I chased these pretty flying things for a long time and then I would sleep in the bunker. I would soon be awakened by the howl of what sounded like a coyote. I had heard of these things through the barking chain, (a famous chain in which every dog in the world sends out a message and is sent to another dog and another and so on) but it didn't register that they were in my neighborhood!!?! I quickly hid in fright in my bunker. It howled again, and it was closer. I ran to the door and started yelping and barking as loud as I possibly could. Again...it howled...and even closer! My big daddy came in and let me in. I was so happy to be inside and not attacked by the coyote!

For the rest of the night I was happy as can be, and went to sleep peacefully!

Much Luv and Gratitude,
Maggie

Entry 2: Love and Support

Dear Diary,

I received some of my first comments! Buh-Reer ( this means I am excited or mad or anything) I was informed by a loud dingy noise and startled me during my sleeping on my fave dirty clothes early this morning when my (what you humans call this silver thing) "lap top" was awakening. I will answer some of the comments:

1. I sleep on the dirty clothes because they smell like my human family and I love them very much.
2. I do need my own clothes! I have a pink little dress that my young momma bought me 2 weeks ago. I love it very much and it's very comfy.
3. Don't forget you are reading a DOG'S blog and it may take me awhile to get the swing of this blog.

Thanks to Windfall Woman, I have received some of my own regular readers. I read her blog and if you haven't read it, you need to! If I knew how to put a link from her blog I would.

Today was a very frustrating day. I was sent out early this morning before I could do my business on my papers. I barked at a squirrel and chased it into my barking post (the woodpile in my backyard). I got very mad and growled at it but didn't notice that the squirrel had already escaped to his tree. I growled for awhile longer until my young momma put a piece of bread out onto the porch and my hunger took over my viciousness. I saw the mean pussy looking at the slice and I barked angrily and growled at him all the way up the stairs to the porch. He backed away but warned me it wasn't over yet, and was picked up and brought inside.

I waited for my best friends to come out and rolled around in some bushes and snorted around in a pile of leaves. When they finally came out, they told me they couldn't stay out for long because a storm was coming. I got excited because a storm means I get to come inside and stay inside extra long. The Whurperts (The 5 Italian Greyhounds. Whurperts is their nickname)were called back inside to be bathed. I was left alone with my sad but optimistic conscious.

The wind picked up and I was blown over. I continued to pant and stare at the sky in hopes of rain. I tried my rain dance (This is a dance I do when I want it to rain that consists of jumping and running around in circles and the lovable stand - on - 2 - paws gesture.) with little success. I received some thunder and more wind. I continued this dance until I grew tired and flopped on the weeds. More and longer thunder came with stronger winds. I stayed low and all the sudden heard the sliding door open! I crawled on my bellums (my belly) to the porch so I wouldn't get knocked over. I galloped inside only to be greeted by the horrible pussy kat. "Sweet revenge" he said. To make him mad sckronkled (a combination of digging and panting and growling and rolling) in his bed. He walked over and poked me with his paw. I got mad and leaped out of his bed and grabbed the pink furry dog dog toy that he loves and showed it off in front of him. He grabbed me neck with his paw and I slung the pink dog out of my mouth and growled and tackled him. I backed off when he dug his nails into my tummy! I grabbed the pink dog and brought it over to my young momma. She played with me for awhile and then the mean pussy attacked again I chased him over to the pantry and then he doubled back swinging his paws at me. I hid in his bed and he left me alone.

After much fighting and chasing. I did my walkabout (I walk aimlessly around the kitchen doing nothing) and begged to be brushed. I was rewarded with a full on brush from my young momma and showed off in front of the mean pussy. He jumped over the gate (this gate blocks me from going anywhere else in the house except for the kitchen and the laundry room.) and went into the den knowing he was defeated.

I finally retired to my clothes pile as the storm picked up to sleep before dinner. I dreamt of the mean pussy and doggy treats. I woke to a big roll of booming (thunder I suppose...I am terrified of thunder and lightening ) and a strike of lightening. I got up in deperate search for human company and saw my young momma sitting at the table typing on her "lap top". My big daddy ( the eldest male human in the family) was watching the glow box and rubbing the mean pussy. I begged my young momma to play with me. She stopped typing and grabbed the pink dog and threw it accross the kitchen. The mean pussy heard us playing and had to steal the attention. She pushed him away when he lunged for my bottom and he retreated to under the desk in the kitchen. He waited in his pounce position and galloped accross the kitchen to attack me. I returned his ambush and was soon yelled at by my young momma. The mean pussy retreated and truced for the rest of the night. I agreed and he went to the water bowl. I did some more walkabouting, and hid under my young momma's chair when their was a roll of booming and a flashing crack. I begged her to let me sit on her lap while she typed. She let me and loved on me while the storm continued. I kissed her on the arm and on her chin. My big daddy went out to the garage with my food bowl and soon returned with it. My young momma put me on the floor so I could eat.

After Dinner I retired to my pile and went to sleep peacefully for the rest of the night.

Much Luv and Thanks,

Maggie

Maggie's very first entry

Dear Diary,

Today was a very lazy-like day. Most of today I slept in my FAVOURITE dirty clothes pile (even though I have a bed!) and did my business on my papers. (some of which didn't quite make it on them...) I was brushed and soon bothered by the mean pussy. That mean pussy scratched me and bit my bottom! I was very mad and lashed back chasing him around which soon he got angry and turned back around. After all that mischief, I took another long nap. Then my big momma (the eldest woman in my human family) pushed me outside. I was forced to frolic outside in our huge backyard.(Which isn't so bad, I'd rather sleep inside on my dirty clothes pile.) I ate weeds and stomped on ants and attacked ant piles. They soon dispersed, and I was victorious! Then, my best friends, 5 Italian Greyhounds, come bounding into their yard from their kitchen. We bark and sniff and play through the fence. They later retire to their indoor luxuries, and I am still left outside...alone...

After sleeping in my bunker (which is a dug out ditch under a bush made by my late brother, Balto, a golden retriever.) for a couple of hours, I resumed to my barking duties and was soon let back inside to play with my toys and eat my supper. I was immediately put back outside so I could do my business, I suppose. I was not left out for long, and was soon called to come back in. I played with my toys with my little momma (The youngest woman in my human family) and was soon attacked by the mean pussy!

I soon retired to my dirty clothes pile to sleep peacefully for the rest of the night.

Much luv,
Maggie